mandy自从和老朋友们重新见面后,整个人陷入了一种迷幻状态,似乎她虽然在这个世界上好好地活着,但似乎有一半魂魄留在了某个遥远的,偏僻的,古早的,隔离的,陌生的,熟悉的时空里。
洛可嘉第一个察觉到她的迷离疑惑,似乎她总是在问,“我是谁”、“我为什么在这里”、“这是哪里”、“这些人都是哪来的”、“原来的我呢?”
走丢了……
她的每一个微笑都在说,“我好困惑”、“我错了吗”、“我怎么办”……
在孙先生拜访后第二天,mandy摔了nichole心爱的大熊猫勺子,第三天她忘了去接oscar放学,第四天她忘了烧饭,那两天洛妈和洛老爹由热旺陪着去费城玩儿了。
洛可嘉忍无可忍,决定跟mandy好好谈谈。
“youarenotyourselfthesedays.”saidlock,lookingdirectlyintohereyes.
“idon‘tquietfollowyou.”returnedmandy,turningthepagesinfrontofherratherrampantly.
“youwantedtofindyourlostselfasateenager,didn‘tyou”lockwasruthless.
“that‘ssountrue.”mandywouldnotlookatherhusbandintheeye.
“wannaatalk”lockretreatedalittlebitbuthisgroundswerefirmlyheld.
“theyhaven‘tchangedmuchsincewelastsawoneanother.”atlastmandydecidedtospilloutallthatwaslingeringonhermind——bearingtheweightiswearisome.
“theywhomintheworlddoyoureferto,thosewhoarenotennabledtoloveoracquireafamily”lockdemanded.
“don‘tbesorude.”mandywasfinallycheeringupalittlebit.
locklaughed,“ibetmostofthemwouldtradewhattheypossessforthelifeyouareliving,evenifthereisahandicappedmaninthepicture.”
mandysmiledforthefirsttime,“nonsense.howdareyou.....”
lockpickeduphismobile,“minerva,howmanyphotosofthekidshavewegot”
theaipoppedupfromnowhereonthescreen,“sinceyouaskedsir,thefamilyalbumhastakenupatleastthreequartersofthestorage,whichmeansthereareoveronethousandphotostotally,andthatseriouslylaggestheprocessingspeedofthemobile.that‘swhyisuggestdeletinghalf......”
“thanks,minerva.that‘swhatineedtolearnforthemoment.”locknoddedtotheai,asifshecouldsee.actullyshedidnoticethat,shewavedbackhappilyandwasoff.
locksaidtomandyassincerelyaspossible,“ibelievewhatyouhavealreadyownedweighsmuchmorethanwhatyouthoughthadlost.”
mandylamented,“howdoyouknowthisisthebestformeicouldhaveledanotherlife.....”l
“idon‘tthinkit‘stherightattitudeforlife.itseemsyouwillalwaysberegrettingoveryoureachandeverychoiceordecision.”therewasanedgetohisvoice,buthestayedcool,“stopcomparingwithothers‘livesandstopmoaningformore.thefishermanandhiswifeshouldhavebeencontentedwithwhattheyhavereceivedfromthegoldfishandthey‘dbetternotbegformorethantheydeserved.”
mandyremarkedwithadangeroustone,“areyoutellingmeidon‘tdeservethebestoflife”
locksensedsomething,“don‘ttwistit.youknowwhatimeant.youwouldneverbeabletofigureoutwhatthebestiswhenyouweresixteen.”
mandymurmuredasifshehadbeeninadream,“howiwishtobesixteenagain,carefree.”
lockcamenearertoher,andhuggedher,leavinghiswheelchairbehind,“thepointis,whateverhappenstoyou,fromnowontosixtyorninety,youwillalwayshaveus.”
mandyburstintotears,“ihavenothingexceptyouandthekids.ifeelcold.thisworldlooksatmewithviciouseyes.”
“youcanalwayscountonus,”lockpromised,“igiveyoumyword.there‘snopartingofusuntilonedies.staypositiveandcherisheveryminute.”
mandyleanedagainstlock‘sshoulder,totallyforgettingheshouldnothavestoodupandsupportedherweight.“iwon‘tfallforit.theylookasifworriedformebutiguesstheyreallyenjoyedthemselvesseeingmealmostcrashed.”
shelookedatlockandwassuddenlystartled,“iwasalmosttakenin.......ishouldn‘thavetoldthemhowibrokedown......iwouldneverletthemreceivethewrongmessageasifmylifewereajoke.”
“don‘toverrespond.”locksaid,“theyareyourfriends,andtheyshowedconcernsaboutourlife.themorepatheticwelook,thefunnieritwouldbewhentheyknowwhatwe‘rereallylike.”
“yes,someofthemdidtrytoruinmyself-esteemandnearlyconvincedmetopitymyself.howcanonebesomean”
locksuggested,“i‘vecomeupwithanidea.whydon‘tweholdaparty”hehesitated,“doesanyofthemhaveafamily”
“no,noneofthemdo.peopledon‘tgetmarriedthesedays,iguesstheyareafraidtogivecommitments.”mandyformedasmileasthoughshefeltsorryforherfriends.
“so,thatsettleseverything.”locksmiledback,“weinviteabunchofkids.”
“doweknowotherkidsbesidesthoseinoscar‘skindergarten”mandyasked.
“oh,ofcoursewedo,”announcedlock,“thereareplentyofkids,asian,latino,andblackinthechildren‘shospital.thiswillbeafund-raisingpartyfordisabledchildren,andmeaswell.”locksatbackintothewheelchairasquicklyashiskneesallowedtocarryhim,whichamusedmandylikehell.
“sincetheyaresokind,suretheydon‘tminddonatingsomedollarsforthegoodcourse”lockquestioned.
“that‘sreallyniceofyou.allofmyfriendswouldbeverythankfuliftheyareofferedachancetoshowthattheyreallycareforthehandicapped.”mandybitherlips,tryinghardnottolaugh.
“isuddenlyrememberihaveoneortwoacquaintancesonthepress.”locksneered,“theywoulddietoseemeonthemoveagain.”